Chicken congress

Recently we had to “remove” a couple of old hens from our gaggle of chickens because they had become mean and awful. A quick history.

Last year we had a few chickens and once they got comfortable in the new chicken condo, they all started laying eggs, which was their sole purpose in our life. Sorry, but thats farm life. After a year together a couple of the older chickens, using seniority as a justification for taking control of the flock, we started to notice something insane and equally abusive.

The old ladies, who we started to call Mitch McConnell and Paul Ryan, mostly because they both seem mean spirited and vengeful, would take over the entryway to the coop whenever they wanted and controlled who could use the egg laying areas. We noticed as the takeover continued that McConnell and Ryan would arbitrally not allow entry to the coop somedays, just to prove their power. During this time, the stress and bitterness felt from the other chickens caused a vast change in laying. We started to have days when we would get no eggs, or one egg that appeared to just be perfunctory, but nothing substantial. It’s as if the ladies went into the coop and voted to defund Obamacare again, while parks fell into disrepair and bridges fell into rivers.

So, realizing something must be done, we removed McConnell and Ryan from their positions of power and made sure they could never again return to ruining the working arrangement of the coop. With the two old geezer chickens now out of the picture, miraculously we once again started seeing daily eggs and the chickens are working together, free ranging and laughing at inside chicken jokes.

There is a lesson to be learned here. When you remove the old, out of touch, bitter and power crazy chickens, the rest of the flock can actually do what we all want them to do.

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